Beyond the Hustle

Tag: relationships

  • Ghosting: The Invisible Sabotage of Trust & Respect

    I was creating content for my marketing business when I found myself diving into a topic that’s been on my mind for a while: ghosting. Not the dating kind, but the kind that happens in business and life, when someone simply disappears instead of responding, following up, or having the hard conversation.

    It struck me that this is something we don’t talk about enough, especially as entrepreneurs, leaders, and professionals navigating fast-paced, emotionally charged spaces. So I thought I’d dive in here and open the door for thought and conversation.

    The Real Problem with Ghosting

    We live in a culture of instant gratification and constant notifications, but ghosting has become alarmingly normalized. However, what may feel like an “easy out” in the moment actually causes long-term harm.

    When you ghost someone, whether it’s a potential client, business partner, vendor, or even a friend, you’re not just avoiding discomfort. You’re sending a message (whether you realize it or not) that their time, effort, or relationship wasn’t worth a response.

    And trust me, that message sticks.

    Why It Matters in Business

    Business is personal. Relationships are the currency of any business, and the way we show up, or don’t, directly impacts our reputation and personal brand.

    Whether you’re saying “yes,” “no,” or “not right now,” clarity is a form of respect. People remember how you communicate when things aren’t easy more than they remember the smooth moments.

    Here’s what happens when we DON’T ghost:

    • We build trust, even when we say no.
    • We protect our reputation and brand integrity.
    • We make space for the right opportunities to flow in.
    • We model healthy boundaries without disappearing.

    Why It Matters in Life

    Ghosting doesn’t just show up in business. It can show up in friendships, family, and even the way we relate to ourselves. When we get overwhelmed or uncomfortable, it’s tempting to pull back instead of leaning in.

    But here’s the truth: Discomfort is not a reason to disappear. It’s a sign to pause, reflect, and communicate with care.

    The Bigger Picture: Boundaries ≠ Ghosting

    Sometimes we confuse boundaries with avoidance. Setting a boundary might mean declining a project or stepping back from a relationship, but it still involves communication. Ghosting skips that step entirely and leaves people confused, hurt, or doubting their worth.

    You don’t need to over-explain or over-justify. A simple response can be both kind and firm.

    Try these:

    • “Thanks for thinking of me, but I’m not available for this opportunity.”
    • “I need to step away from this relationship, and I wish you well.”
    • “Right now isn’t the right time for me, but I appreciate your message.”

    Let’s Normalize Showing Up

    I believe communication is a core part of conscious living and working. We’re not here to ghost our way through the hard parts, but rather we’re here to build something better. That means responding. Being honest. Choosing clarity over comfort.

    You don’t have to be perfect. Just present.

    Have you ever been ghosted in business, or accidentally ghosted someone yourself? What did you learn from it?

    Drop a comment or share this post with someone who values showing up. 💬

    Denise xo

    Leave a comment

  • Politics and Personal Relationships: How We Can Do Better

    Yep, I’m diving in! But don’t worry—it’s all about conversation, not confrontation.

    Let me start by asking—remember when no one knew (or cared) which political party you supported? I miss those days. But thanks to the internet and social media, those lines have been blurred forever.

    Lately, I’ve noticed a shift on LinkedIn (a platform that I thought for sure would stay out of politics), and if you’ve been there long enough, you might have noticed it too. What was once a platform primarily for professional growth, networking, and industry insights has become increasingly political. Discussions that were once reserved for other social media platforms are now front and center, with political opinions, debates, and even outright arguments filling the feed.

    This shift raises some big questions for me:
    🔹 How does this impact job seekers who rely on LinkedIn to build their careers?
    🔹 Are small business owners and entrepreneurs feeling more (or less) freedom to be authentic—or more pressure to take a stance?
    🔹 Are companies making hiring or business decisions based on political beliefs?

    This shift got me thinking: Is there a way to have these discussions without damaging personal and professional relationships? Because whether we like it or not, politics is everywhere—our workplaces, social circles, and even family gatherings. And while being informed and engaged is important, the growing polarization has also created deep divisions.

    But does it have to be this way? Can we explore political differences without making everything a battleground? I believe we can. And that’s why I’m going all in on this conversation, because it’s as much for me as it is for you.

    The Rise of Political Polarization

    There’s no denying that political discourse has become more intense. Social media and search engines are designed to amplify opinions, often creating echo chambers where we’re only exposed to perspectives that reinforce our own. Meanwhile, news outlets tailor content to specific ideologies, making it easier than ever to stay within our comfort zones.

    Here’s a thought-provoking challenge: Try searching for the same topic as a friend or colleague and compare your results. Chances are, you’ll see different information. That’s not a coincidence—it’s by design. If you’ve seen The Social Dilemma, you know how algorithms shape what we see, subtly influencing our beliefs and interactions. In many ways, we’re all being manipulated—whether we realize it or not.

    Check out this short clip (it’s a fascinating documentary worth watching):

    But here’s the reality: No two people will ever agree on everything. Expecting complete alignment—whether in politics, religion, or lifestyle choices—is unrealistic. Healthy relationships and societies are built on diverse perspectives and respectful debate, not total agreement.

    And here’s another reality: Every time a new political administration takes power, those who didn’t vote for them will inevitably find fault with their decisions. It’s a predictable cycle—one side cheers, the other side critiques. Policies shift, priorities change, and no matter who’s in charge, opposition always finds something to criticize.

    Oh, and one more thing—you can’t judge someone’s political beliefs by their appearance or lifestyle. Wearing a flag shirt, driving a certain car, or listening to country music doesn’t automatically place someone in a political box. We need to move past stereotypes and stop making assumptions about people.

    We are complex human beings, shaped by diverse experiences and values. While we may lean one way or the other, few of us align 100% with any party. We hold nuanced opinions, disagree even with “our own side” at times, and make decisions based on more than just political labels. It’s a reminder that real conversations—not assumptions—are what truly help us understand one another.

    Why Losing Relationships Over Politics Isn’t Worth It

    At the end of the day, our relationships—whether personal or professional—are built on much more than political views. Shared experiences, mutual support, and personal history should matter more than a difference in voting decisions.

    Ask yourself:
    ✅ Will today’s political debate matter in five years?
    ✅ Does winning an argument feel better than maintaining a meaningful relationship?
    ✅ Are you listening to understand, or just waiting to respond?

    Of course, some differences are deeply personal, and certain beliefs may feel harder to reconcile. But in most cases, a disagreement doesn’t have to mean the end of a relationship—especially if both people approach the conversation with mutual respect.

    How to Be More Tolerant of Different Views

    1. Practice Active Listening – Instead of reacting immediately, take a moment to truly hear the other person’s perspective. Ask questions, seek understanding, and look for common ground.
    2. Recognize That People’s Experiences Shape Their Views (this is HUGE)– Backgrounds, upbringings, and life experiences influence opinions. Understanding someone’s story can help bridge divides.
    3. Agree to Disagree – Not every conversation needs a resolution. Sometimes, the best approach is to acknowledge the difference and move on.
    4. Know When to Walk Away – If a discussion becomes heated or unproductive, it’s okay to change the subject or take a break. Protecting your peace is just as important as expressing your views.
    5. Respect Boundaries – If someone prefers not to discuss politics, honor that. Forcing the conversation rarely leads to positive outcomes.
    6. Lead with Kindness (this should actually be first on the list)– You don’t have to agree with someone to treat them with respect. Kindness and civility go a long way in keeping relationships intact.

    Bringing It All Together

    Politics may be more visible than ever—especially on platforms like LinkedIn—but it doesn’t have to define our relationships. We can choose to engage with openness, prioritize understanding over division, and remind ourselves that people are more than their political beliefs.

    Disagreements are inevitable, but how we handle them is a choice. By focusing on respect, listening, and the bigger picture, we can create healthier conversations and, more importantly, stronger relationships—both online and offline.

    💬 What do you think? Have you found ways to share political differences while maintaining important relationships? Let’s talk about it below!

    Let’s Connect!

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  • A Tribute to My Mother on My 60th Birthday

    Sixty years—a milestone that makes me pause and reflect on the journey that has brought me here. As I step into this new decade, my heart is filled with gratitude for the woman who shaped me, guided me, and loved me unconditionally: my mother.

    From my earliest memories, my mother was the constant force in my life. My Northstar. She was my first teacher, my fiercest protector, and my greatest cheerleader. She taught me resilience when times were tough, grace when challenges seemed insurmountable, and kindness as the foundation of every interaction. Her lessons were never just words; they were actions—woven into the fabric of everyday life.

    She showed me what strength looked like—not the loud or boastful kind, but the quiet, unwavering strength that gets up every morning, faces the world with determination, and gives selflessly to others. Whether it was late nights spent tending to me when I was sick, standing by my side during life’s difficult moments, or celebrating every small and big victory, she was always there.

    My mother’s love was never conditional. It was steady, enduring, and boundless. She had an incredible way of making me feel that no matter what life threw my way, I would be okay because I had her belief in me. And that belief? It became the foundation for my own self-confidence, for the courage to chase my dreams, and for the wisdom to navigate life’s twists and turns.

    Now, at sixty, I look back and realize how much of her is in me. The values she instilled, the love she gave, and the sacrifices she made—they are all etched into the person I have become. And though time has passed, her presence in my life remains just as strong, whether in memories, in the values I carry forward, or in the way I love those around me.

    So this week, as I celebrate this milestone, I dedicate it to my mother. To her love, her lessons, and her legacy. Because without her, I would not be the person I am today. And for that, I am forever grateful.

    Here’s to you, Mom—my guiding light, my heart, my home. Thank you for everything.

    Let’s Connect!

  • Surviving a Narcissist: The Toxicity, The Chaos, and The Lessons

    Have you ever been the target of a narcissist? If so, you know the mental gymnastics, the manipulation, and the relentless toxicity that come with it. If you haven’t—consider yourself lucky.

    It wasn’t until later in my adult life and career that a narcissist quietly infiltrated my world. My narcissist disguised themselves as good, pure, loving, and honorable—a true chameleon. At first, it was all rainbows and butterflies—until, suddenly, I had no idea what hit me.

    My fight-or-flight instinct kicked in, but instead of running, I looked around at others, who seemed fine, and thought, “It must be me.” (Ugh…a home run for the narcissist.)

    The ironic part? The moment I started confiding in friends and family, they immediately said, “You’re dealing with a narcissist.” It wasn’t one big, obvious event—it was a slow, calculated unraveling. A series of tiny, almost imperceptible manipulations that built the foundation for something far more damaging.

    Fortunately for me, our relationship ended abruptly. At first, I was in shock. But with time—and a lot of self-reflection—I finally felt something I hadn’t in a long time: I could breathe again. Really breathe.

    I was recently talking to a friend about the crushing grip narcissists have on their victims and the slow surrender we unknowingly give them. It’s a psychological game—one designed to strip away your confidence and leave you questioning your reality. And escaping? That’s another battle entirely for so many.

    Breaking free from a narcissist feels like emerging from a cult-like trance—your identity shaken to its core. Thank goodness for the self-help section on Amazon, podcasts, and therapy, right?!

    The Narcissist’s Playbook: A Masterclass in Manipulation

    At first, they charm you (This is known as the honeymoon phase.). They praise your work, admire your talents, and build you up—only to slowly chip away at your confidence. The gaslighting is subtle at first:

    🌀 “I never said that.” (They did.)
    🌀 “I’m sorry you feel that way.” (Zero accountability.)
    🌀 “I’ve done so much for you, and it’s not appreciated.” (Lies.)

    Before you know it, you’re walking on eggshells, second-guessing yourself, and questioning truths you once knew. That’s the toxicity of a narcissist—they LITERALLY rewrite reality to serve their ego.

    The Fallout: Breaking Free from the Cycle

    Realizing you’re in a narcissist’s grip feels like waking up from a nightmare you didn’t know you were trapped in. You start seeing the patterns, the control, the meanness, the manipulation—but getting out? That’s where the real fight begins, especially for those married to one (for the sake of my husband, I want to clarify that I’m not referring to him here).

    Narcissists don’t let go easily. They crave control. They twist narratives, spread lies, and play the victim to maintain their power. And when you finally break free? They’ll do everything in their power to paint you as the villain.

    The Lesson: Reclaiming Your Power

    Here’s the good news—you learn. You recognize the red flags sooner. You set boundaries quicker and stronger. And most importantly, you take back your power!

    If you’ve been through this, you’re not alone. The scars narcissists leave behind are real, but they’re also proof that you survived.

    Want to Outsmart a Narcissist? Listen to This.

    Mel Robbins has hosted remarkable guests who break down the psychology of narcissists—and, more importantly, how to break free from their grip. If you haven’t listened to “Outsmart a Narcissist: A Proven 4-Step Plan to Take Your Power Back,“ it’s a must, so grab your 🎧 headphones and listen with intention and purpose.

    I listened to it on a hike—the place I go to find clarity. I’d love to know what you think after you listen to the full episode.

    For anyone who needs some tips and strategies, I’m including a great resource I found from The Counseling Center Group. Here is “How to Handle a Narcissist: 8 Effective Strategies For Self-Care.“

    Have you ever dealt with a narcissist? Drop a comment or share your experience—because the more we talk about it, the more we reclaim our power, and the more we help others.

    Make moves, live boldly!

    2 responses to “Surviving a Narcissist: The Toxicity, The Chaos, and The Lessons”

    1. Avatar
      Anonymous

      You nailed it! Thanks for sharing and reminding us to assess all relationships. Life’s too short to spend time with the wrong people.

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      1. Denise Irving Avatar
        Denise Irving

        Thank you so much for reading my post, and I’m glad it resonated with you. For people who haven’t experienced this behavior it can take some time to realize what is happening in the relationship.

        Assessing all relationship is spot on!

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